Workout #32 of 2020 and a heck of a lot of motivation

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Today’s workout consisted of the following

  • Decline Reverse Sit-up – 3 sets of 15
  • Decline Russian Twist – 3 sets of 12 w/10lbs
  • Incline Chest Fly – 3 sets of 15 w/5lbs
  • Incline Bench Press – 3 sets of 10 w/20lbs (attempted 15 reps but failed after first one)
  • Pullover Dumbbell – 3 sets of 15 w/10lbs
  • Overhead Press – 3 sets of 5 w/20lbs barbell (I had all intention of doing 15, but I have not strength overhead)
  • Front Raise – 3 sets of 10 w/10lbs
  • Chest Fly – 3 sets of 15 w/25lbs
  • Reverse Fly – 3 sets of 15 w/25lbs
  • Incline Push-up – 3 sets of 10
  • Plank – 3 sets of 20 seconds

Everyday, I push myself more and more. Sometimes, maybe I push myself too much. I don’t know. This morning as I was driving to work after the gym, I felt good about what I am doing. Here I was going to the gym by myself. All my routines and exercises, minus training days, I have picked out myself. I don’t have any real gym friends that I work out with so this is very lonely too. Everything I do has to be through my own motivation.

Yes, I have cheerleaders on the side but I have no one holding my hand or standing next to me as I take these steps for myself. It would be easy for me to regress, slow down, and go to the gym less often since the other person holding me accountable is myself. Its easy to make excuses of why you can’t work out or why you can’t eat properly, but the only person I am cheating is myself. I have let myself down over and over again. I have beaten myself up for getting fat, for quitting before, for giving up, and for not caring. No one is going to do this for me. I don’t want to be where I am. I don’t want to be 206 lbs.

Each day, I get up and make a conscious decision to eat well and to not give in to the temptations around me. No, I do not go to the gym everyday but just because I am giving myself a rest, doesn’t mean I quit. I did not become fat overnight, I will not become fit overnight either. The only person stopping me from getting fit, getting stronger, and getting healthier is myself. I just won’t let my inner fat kid win.

I hear so many time people saying, they want to lose weight or they want to get stronger or fit or healthy…they have the power to do it. But every time they say they can’t or its too hard, they add another brick to the wall that is stopping them from achieving their goal. Yes, its hard – It is hard to wake up an hour earlier to give something to myself. Yes, its hard to walk past chocolate and candy everyday and say no. Ultimately, what do I want more? The candy or the 160 lbs?